fietsen en fietsers zijn koning

Here in our tiny little part of the world bicycles (fietsen) and bicyclists (fietsers) are king. They sit at the top of the pecking order, above pedestrians and even above cars and drivers.

1) There is nary a store in NL that doesn't have some bike equipment/accessory for sale. Spare tires, bike pumps, seat covers, locks and lights can be found in pretty much every chain store. Kruidvat (closest US equivalent is Walgreens or CVS)... check! Action (closest equivalent is Wal-Mart, if Wal-Mart opened a store in the land of the Liliputians)... check! Albert Heijn (grocery store)... check! I may not be able to find American style coffee cream but I can sure as shit find a bike part!!

2) Roads and sidewalks are modified to accommodate bicycles. In many places there is a special lane built specifically for bicycles. If not a special lane, then part of the existing driving lane is reserved for bicycles. And if that fails, hell, there's always the road itself or the sidewalk. Basically, if a bicyclist feels like biking somewhere, nothing is going to stop them. Just today I saw someone biking on the boardwalk RIGHT BESIDE THE BIKE LANES! I really did not understand this since the municipality makes sure the bike lanes are cleared of snow, which we had left over from the other day, but not the walking areas. WHAT GIVES?! My head almost exploded.

Many staircases have a ramp built into them so people can walk their bike down the sidewalk on the ramp. We wouldn't want to inconvenience the bicyclist, right?

It's not uncommon to see a do not enter road sign with the obligatory "uitgezonderd" ("except") and a picture of a bicycle.

Bicycles are ALWAYS "uitgezonderd" - even if there is no sign

3) Bicyclists seem to have a general disregard for rules of conduct. In some places the bike lane is 2-way but in other places it's 1-way, 1 bike lane on each side of the road. In situations where the bike lane is 1-way and a bicyclist doesn't feel like going to the other side of the road to bike in the correct direction, they simply bike on the sidewalk. Cuz, ya know, pedestrians are just that insignificant.

Another way in which bicyclists don't want to be inconvenienced is if their destination is a little further ahead down the sidewalk. Instead of staying on the bike path as long as possible or dismounting and walking their bicycles on the sidewalk, they will just continue zipping along the sidewalk until they reach their location.  Again, pedestrians be damned!!

In some places bars have been erected offset from each other. I haven't figured out if they're supposed to prevent bicycles completely or just force bicyclists to dismount. (I'm pretty sure they're not to prohibit cars because short metal poles are usually used for that). Whatever their purpose, they don't work. Not only do bicyclists ignore the bars, I've rarely seen 1 dismount when going through.

"Why do they put these things up to slow me down?!"

Yes, I have a bike. I try to follow the rules of the road. I know I've made some mistakes, and I deeply regret them. Heck I even had a Dutch woman curse at me because I stopped in the middle of the bike lane. Fortunately the Dutch word for sorry is "sorry". The bicyclists simultaneously expect everyone  to follow the rules AND feel the rules don't apply to them.

So if you want to visit NL and bike around, be prepared. The language, the signs, the unspoken rules, and the natives themselves will eat you alive.