The Dutch are so closed off, but I'm not going to embrace their culture!

Within a few months of arriving in NL I attended a free seminar designed for expats. I don't remember the exact title, but I always referred to it as "How not to piss off the Dutch". The main purpose of the seminar was to help non-Dutchies gain some insight into how Dutch society works so as to be able to better integrate.

One part of Dutch culture revolves around not closing your curtains... period. Doesn't matter how close your house is to the sidewalk or what room it is, curtain closing can be viewed as a no-no. The Dutch will wonder "What do they have to hide?".

Now, on the flip side, one is not supposed to look into the windows of houses. This can be quite difficult when someone's living room window is less than 5 feet away from you as you walk down the sidewalk and there is movement in the house (my head almost always moves in the direction of any motion detected in my peripheral vision). Also, residences and businesses can exist side-by-side. One is supposed to look in a store window, right? On top of that, people put pretty things in their windows.. am I not supposed to look at those? (read about this behavior here).

I mention all of this because recently in an NL expat FB group someone asked how the other non-Dutchies were dealing with the heat. AC just isn't a thing here, which I get, because it's not hot for months on end, and the Dutch can be quite a frugal people. Alas, window screens aren't a thing either!! UGH! We opened the windows on Sunday to let in some fresh air and about 100 flies took the opportunity to set up residence.

Anywho... the original poster asked if others were just sitting around their houses naked to get some respite. This led to a discussion about being naked with the curtains open. One person actually replied "You don't have to do these social control things just because they do. We don't have to take on their quirks unless we feel like it!" The irony being he/she is probably one of those people who shakes their head in disgust when Americans "stand out" in foreign countries via their behavior.

I also often read complaints about how the Dutch aren't very welcoming to non-Dutchies. Well... with attitudes like the one above, why would they? If you're going to thumb your nose at the social norms of the natives don't be shocked/angered/hurt if they keep you at arm's length.

(Full disclosure: we close our curtains in the afternoon/evening, but only because the sun shines directly into our apartment making it almost impossible to watch TV or simply be comfortable)

One year anniversary

Tuesday August 27, 2019  (Dinsdag 27 Augustus)

On this Tuesday in 2018 I got off a plane at Schiphol airport in Amsterdam, NL and began a brand new life.

I didn't sleep a wink during the flights (1 leg from Baltimore to Iceland and another leg from Iceland to NL) over to Europe, having spent much of the time crying, mourning the loss of the life I was leaving behind: my sons, the home I had lived in for 14 years, my friends, my job (well, not so much mourning that one 😉). But those feelings of loss were mingled with excitement about seeing my husband again who had already moved to NL 5 months prior.

So.. here I am, 1 year later and it has been a mixed blessing...

During that time hubs and I have visited 7 countries and 2 continents! (in chronological order) Portugal (Sept), Spain (Sept), Ireland (Oct - unfortunately for the funeral of one of hubs' uncles), Belgium (Nov), Morocco (Feb -- woo hoo! another continent under my belt), UK (April - England and Wales - great to have a friend from the US visiting!!!), Ireland (May - take 2) and the Czech Republic (July).

And next week we're going to spend a few days in Paris to meet friends of hubs with a stop in Belgium (Bruges and possibly Ghent) as we all drive back to our apartment.

Hubs and I have set a goal of visiting all 12 provinces of NL. So far we've visited 11. Overijssel... we haven't forgotten you!! Part of this goal included seeing the world's oldest functioning planetarium which was quite cool.

We experienced the phenomenon (and controversy) that is the arrival of Sinter Klaas and Zwarte Piet  on December 5 at the port, a much bigger deal here in NL than Christmas, which is a very subdued day spent with family and attending church services for those who are inclined.

We were fortunate enough to spend 2 weeks around the holidays back in the US. It was wonderful to see my sons again. I have resigned myself to their hesitancy to fly and that the only time I will see them is if I go back to the US. I just wish they were a little chattier over FB PM!!!

After about 7 months I received my residency permit... let's just say that bureaucrats here aren't much different than they are back in the US. "My job is to collect papers. It is *NOT* to tell you that you gave me copies that will not be accepted by the immigration services."

I've also made a friend or 2 here in NL. One I have yet to actually meet in person, but she was very kind, she saw me posting on an expat FB page and actually called to let me know she was there for me if I needed/wanted. We still interact over FB. Another lives closer and we have regular "dates" now which have been quite enjoyable.

Ik heb wat Nederlands geleerd (I have learned some Dutch). This has been very helpful as I feel less and less isolated since I can read much of what I see out on the street. And I can have basic conversations with sales clerks... just need to work on understanding them better!!

I've learned to book-end my conversations with some form of hello and goodbye... and thanks to the above item I've been able to add to my repertoire of acceptable phrases.

I have experienced the beach closing for the season (so weird to see the restaurants being boxed up and hauled away from the beach!) and the beach re-opening for the season (so weird to see all the restaurants being unboxed and put back on the beach!).

I have experienced the shortened winter days where the sun never rises any higher than about the 10am mark.

I have experienced the wonder of having the sun stay up until past 11pm.

I missed celebrating (in person) my sons' birthdays.

I've missed spending my younger son's last "free" summer with him.

I've missed seeing my younger son head off for his last year of undergrad.

I've missed many weekly coffee-dates and several Sunday breakfast outings with my older son.

I have had to adjust to the time difference... hours where my friends and family back home are still asleep and aren't available to chat. (Although... some of you seem to be experience a little insomnia which has come in handy when it's 7am here - lol!)

I've been yelled at by someone on a moped while I was biking on the bike path because I didn't get over fast enough for him.

I've been kicked in the back of my chair in the movie theater because I was looking at my phone during the previews.

I've adjusted to dates being displayed in DD-MM-YYYY format, clocks being displayed in 24 hour format, and addresses being displayed in <STREET NAME> <HOUSE#> format (e.g. instead of 123 Main St, here it is written as Main Street 123)

I've experienced the wonder that are oliebollen and the disgust that is store-made stamppot. (Seriously -- the Dutch can make some decent desserts like oliebollen and appeltaart, but haven't seem to mastered a delicious main course)

I have visited some amazing museums... I've seen Rembrandt's "The Night Watch" and Vermeer's "Girl with the Pearl Earring". Pretty much every museum hubs and I have visited has not required payment for a ticket thanks to the country's Museumkaart. I've actually visited a few museums repeatedly without paying an entrance fee. (If I wanted to I could see "Girl with the Pearl Earring" every day the museum is open and not buy a ticket. It's like the Smithsonian, but throughout the country, there is an annual fee, and it is only for museums)

I've visited at least 3 UNESCO World Heritage sites: the canals in Amsterdam, Kinderdijk (a village with 18th-century windmills), and the historic center of Prague.

I've "Dutchified" my bike with the addition of a headlight, rear tire frame and saddlebags. The saddlebags come in handy when I bike to Jumbo (pronounced "yumbo") for grocery shopping.

In Ireland I drove a right-hand drive manual car for more than 15 minutes and SURVIVED!

I've learned which stores to go to for certain items (for example, Aldi is the best place to get coffee pods for our Nespresso), and I've added the local Thursday farmer's market to my weekly grocery shopping venues.

I've become blasė about riding the tram and train to get to where I need to be.

I've gotten lost numerous times on my bike trying to find my way to Haagse Markt only to FINALLY discover I had been making it exceedingly more complicated than it needed to be.

I've learned to plan my errands around free bathrooms and to hold my nose if I absolutely had to use the facilities while on the train. (I've also learned to make sure I have tissues and hand sanitizer with me just in case neither toilet paper nor water were available in the train toilet)

I've become more adept at avoiding stepping in dog shit while walking around Scheveningen.
I have NOT learned how to pronounce Scheveningen properly.

All in all, this is has been a great experience, despite my moments of sadness and feelings of loss. Hubs and I have accrued some wonderful memories that we will be able to hold onto for the rest of our lives (or until dementia kicks in)

So... if anyone can find a way to get my sons to get over their flying issues AND make them a bit more chatty on FB PM I think I'd be ok to stay here for a couple more years - after all, we haven't visited *ALL* the EU countries 😜

Dutch provinces - North Holland

As I mentioned in this blog there are 12 provinces in The Netherlands. This entry will briefly cover North Holland (Noord-Holland).

Location of North Holland

Flag of North Holland

North Holland is the province where the country's capital, Amsterdam, is located.

Flag of Amsterdam

I haven't actually seen much of Noord-Holland, having spent the bulk of my time in that province in Amsterdam, which has enough museums and sights to keep one occupied for several days (and let's not forget the Heineken Experience!! But, to be honest, I was feeling really old by the end of that tour). I've visited the Anne Frank house twice so far, with a 3rd visit planned for next month. Fortunately, most of the museums in Amsterdam are included with the Museumkaart and are thus free.

The location that ranks second for amount of time spent would be Schiphol airport. The runways are vast, crossing at least 1 highway. I generally joke that we're in Germany by the time we actually take off. 

I did visit Zaanse Schans when my friend came to visit back in April. It is the more touristy version of Kinderdijk.

There is also the IJsselmeer which is currently a lake (hence "meer") but was once part of the Zuiderzee but was blocked off to create a fresh water lake. Boat trips on the lake are available.

I've heard that Haarlem is a pretty town (home of another Ikea) but I have yet to actually make a stop there.

Gym complaints

About 6 weeks ago I joined a gym here in NL. It's a no-frills gym, as indicated by it's name "Basic Fit". It has a few things going for it: 1) it's only €20 every 4 weeks (yes, every 4 weeks, not per month); 2) I can go to any of their locations throughout Europe with my membership; 3) they have all the equipment that I want; 4) the closest location is a 5 minute walk from our apartment.

Unfortunately, I was spoiled back in the US by the gym in the office building where I worked because I would go there right after work and usually have the place all to myself. And if I went on the weekend I *DEFINITELY* had the place all to myself. No lunks. No loud music. No waiting to use the equipment (even though there was only 2 elliptical machines). Little did I know at the time that I was in gym heaven.

Alas, that is no longer the case. And being a bit of an introvert I have some "issues" with the gym. These issues are not specific to Basic Fit (except maybe 1)  nor are they specific to Dutchies. But I need to get these grievances off my chest, so please humor me.

1) all the noise, noise, noise, NOISE
a) The gym plays music throughout the facility at a level to which I am almost unable to hear my iPod without cranking up the volume so much I'm in fear of going deaf. I do understand and appreciate that on some level this is related to my inability to tune out background noise of any kind, but it is quite loud and annoying. And, from what I can see, bordering on unnecessary as almost everyone comes with their own music.

b) People DROP the weights which generates a thunderous sound and an ensuing vibration. IMHO, if you are dropping weight in such a fashion then 1 of 2 things is happening: 1) you are using too heavy a weight and are unable to maintain control until you lower it to its final resting place; 2) you want EVERYONE in the gym to acknowledge just how heavy a weight you are "pumping" and are therefore an ass.

Example: One day, as I was leaving the gym, this guy was using what appeared to be a barbell that was attached on one end to a weight lifting frame and on the other end were a SHITLOAD of weights. He was pushing the weighted end up in the air as the other end of the barbell pivoted on the floor. Welp, when he was done, he simply DROPPED THE BARBELL FROM ABOUT 5' OFF THE GROUND. Holy crap! WHY!?!?

c) People grunting while they work out. I'm not saying people aren't allowed to make some noise while they exercise/lift weights, but... COME ON! You're not pushing out a baby, nor are you lifting a car off someone, especially on a cardio machine. I contend that, here too, it MIGHT be done just to get some attention from other gym members "Look at me! I'm exercising so heavily I need to sound like a moose in rut!!"

2) abusing the equipment
a) Part of this complaint is tied to the second paragraph above. I think dropping the weights is bad for the equipment. I know 1 gym I went to back in the US explicitly stated that dropping weights was prohibited.

Example: Just this morning as I was entering the gym I saw a guy drop 2 weight discs on the floor at the same time. I cannot imagine that is good for the discs.

b) Another way people "abuse" the equipment is by occupying TWO MACHINES AT THE SAME FREAKING TIME!!! I've seen members leave their towel on 1 weight machine and then go use another one. COME ON! That's just rude!!

c) This last example isn't necessarily "abusing" the equipment, but it's kind of related to the example above and I didn't think it warranted its own category. There are people who spend A LOT longer on the weight machines just sitting there as opposed to the amount of time they spend actually lifting weights. I have no idea what they're doing... balancing their checkbook? stalking an ex? applying for a mortgage? But I'll pass by the machine and the person will be deeply absorbed in their phone for several minutes. I know there are apps out there to help one with their weight training goals, even the gym has an app, but the amount of time these people are spending JUST SITTING THERE far exceeds the amount of time required to enter the number of reps they just completed and at what weight amount. No matter what they're doing between reps, they are not actually using the machine and they are leaving it idle for a large amount of time.

3) smells
I have experienced the gamut of smells at this gym. One day I was walking behind the elliptical machines towards one that was unoccupied. I got a whiff of something rather pungent as I made my way. Pungent as in... "I'm doing my part to save the planet by not showering for 3 weeks". You can imagine that this smell DOES NOT get better as one exercises. I was trying to breathe through my mouth so as not to retch and discovered that I could actually TASTE THE SMELL.

On the other end of the spectrum was the guy who smelled like he had just taken a swim in a pool filled with cologne. GAW! As he exercised the smell just became stronger and stronger and stronger. Here again, I was trying to breathe through my mouth so as not to smell it. Cologne doesn't taste good.

Despite these complaints I will keep going as I have signed up for a year membership. Don't worry about me, I'll adapt. ;-)

Dutch Provinces - South Holland

There are 12 provinces in The Netherlands: North Holland, South Holland, Zeeland, Gronigen, Friesland, Utrecht, Flavoland, Drenthe, Overijssel, Gelderland, North Brabant and Limburg. While living in NL hubs and I are on a mission to find something to visit in each province.

My first entry in this series is South Holland (Zuid-Holland). I am starting with South Holland because it is the province in which hubs and I live.

The 2 largest (population-wise) cities in South Holland are Den Haag and Rotterdam which also happen to be 2nd and 3rd largest cities in the entire country respectively. (Amsterdam is #1 and is located in North Holland)

Location of South Holland

Flag of South Holland

There is very little in Den Haag that hubs and I have not seen either by tram, bus, train, bike or foot. We live in Scheveningen which is where the beach is located and which is about 5km from city center.

Flag of Scheveningen

Den Haag is also where the Dutch government is seated (although Amsterdam is the country's capital city).

Binnenhof - seat of Dutch parliament

Flag of Den Haag

There are many interesting museums to see as well, and I think I've seen all but a handful thanks to my Museumkaart!  A couple museums of note are Mauritshuis which is where "Girl with the Pearl Earring" is located (this museum is situated just to the left of the building in the above photo), and Escher in Het Paleis, a whole museum dedicated to Escher (🎵my fav-or-ite MC!🎵 - lol)

If you want to get a glimpse at all The Netherlands has to offer I recommend a visit to Madurodam, located about 1/2 way between city center and the beach. The 9 tram stop at Madurodam used to add "Miniature City" in a very posh British accent as part of the automated stop announcement but the powers that be have removed that from it sometime after April 2019.

Hubs and I took a self-guided walking tour of Rotterdam a while back which was focused on the "fire boundary" of the city - the periphery of the May 14, 1940 bombing of Rotterdam. Because much of Rotterdam was destroyed during the war there is a lot of modern architecture. The most famous of the modern architecture in Rotterdam are the "Cube Houses". They are actual houses in which people reside. One house is not occupied and is available for viewing. As you can guess from their shape, the interiors are small with odd angles making for quite a bit of unusable space.

Cube Houses

For a quaint visit I highly recommend the town of Delft which can be easily reached from Den Haag via the 1 tram. It is the home of Royal Delft, the famous pottery company and the town is quaint and picturesque  -  make sure your camera batteries are full and your memory card is empty. (It's also where our closest Ikea can be found!!)

Free range parenting - Dutch level

The general consensus here regarding parenting seems to be "Unless an appendage has been lost, I don't care what my child does". The parents really just don't seem to care what their children are doing. Many times, you can't even tell who the parent is because the kids have been permitted to wander far away from the parents.

One time I saw 2 women biking along the boardwalk with 3 children. One of the children, who looked to be about 3 years old, was on a little razor thingy (see image below)... FAR behind the adults. Neither of the women seemed to care or notice. It was almost like watching one of those nature shows where the momma animal is on the move and if one of her offspring doesn't make it then... oh well.

One mode of transportation for children not old enough to bike

A few weeks ago hubs and I were walking along the beach and saw a girl of about 2 or 3 years of age walking and crying, yelling "momma". We looked, no one in the immediate vicinity was reacting. We then spotted a woman about 50' away from the girl pushing a stroller who turned around and seemed to acknowledge the girl existed and was still alive. She didn't stop to let the girl catch up, she just kept on going.

Last year hubs and I went to a museum dedicated to antique and classic cars. One of the rooms contained fuel pumps that were quite old. We watched several children try their best to destroy the pumps. None of the adults in the room seemed to care. Turns out none of the adults in the room were the children's parents. They arrived several minutes later, not that it really mattered. They didn't seem to care what the children were doing either. No appendages were missing... no behavior to be modified or corrected.

I don't support helicopter parenting either, but if the parents aren't reprimanding the children for their behavior, who will?

The Locksmith

The apartment hubs and I live in comes with a parking spot. Since we don't have a car, the only items ever parked in it are our bikes. A very common feature of parking spaces here in NL is what I've heard called a "bullbar" (not sure if I'm spelling that properly. It is a device that when raised prohibits others from parking in the parking spot.

Bullbar in up and in down positions

Shortly after hubs moved into the apartment (and before I arrived) he pulled the bullbar into the "up" position so that we could lock our bikes to it. As I said, we don't have a car so there was never a need to put the bar down.

We have guests coming in September who will have a car and will need the parking spot. There was a key in the kitchen which I thought was the key to the bullbar, but alas, it was not. Hubs searched through all the keys he had and came up empty. The landlord said that the key had been turned over to us at move-in and had a document with hubs' initials on it affirming that. That left us with 1 option... find a locksmith to remove the existing lock and put in a new one.

The trend here in NL (or at least Den Haag) seems to be that if a store repairs shoes it also makes keys. So, we stopped at 1 such place in city center and they told us they didn't do it. We stopped at another such place much closer to our apartment. We were told the owner knew more about that and he was on vacation, expected to be back the next Tuesday. The following Tuesday we stopped by again and were told the owner wouldn't be back until Thursday. (Sigh) On Thursday I stopped by, the owner *WAS* there (WOO HOO!) and he gave me the name of someone who actually did do this for a living.

Sidebar: When I have to interact with the locals, I'm really trying to practice my Dutch. I went into the shop, and started my conversation (in Dutch) with "My husband and I live on Palaceplein (the name of our street) and we have a bullbar in our parking spot". The owner said something in Dutch, I said I didn't speak Dutch well, and he answered that he had asked me if I wanted to talk about that. Ha! The literal Dutch.

Back to the main thread...
I have a hard enough time talking to the locals when it's face-to-face. I'm almost petrified to talk to them on the phone. Thus, it took me a few days to screw up the courage to call the number on the card. But, I did screw up the courage and the person on the other end of the phone ("Joop" - pronounced "yope") said he could come by in about 20 minutes.

Actually, the conversation was much more protracted because  he had trouble understanding the address so he asked me to send him a text message, which I did. I waited about 15 minutes and then headed down to the lobby to wait for Joop. After a short period of time I became concerned that I had misunderstood him regarding what time he would show up, so I texted him to remind him that I was waiting for him in the lobby and to ask what time did he say he could be there. He replied "5 minutes. coper cleur". I thought "coper cleur" was some Dutch thing, so I plugged it into Google translate and got nothing.. except the same words in all caps. Huh?

He shows up soon after that and I see that he's wearing a copper colored blazer. AH! "cleur" is close to "kleur" which is the Dutch word for "color", so I thought he meant he would be wearing a copper colored jacket. So far, we're off to a decent start. I take him to the parking spot and he starts talking about how it should be ok for him to leave his car where he parked it and that we could go upstairs. OK - now I'm confused. Then it dawns on him and on me at the same time. There was a miscommunication. He thought I needed help with the apartment lock and that I was just showing him where the parking spot was so he could move his car.  Hurdle jumped... he gets down to the business of removing the lock in the bullbar.

Let me describe Joop. He is older than I am. In fact, at 1 point he proudly informs me that he is 81!! He is shorter than I am and I'm only 5'5". He also weighs less than I do. He's toting these 2 heavy toolboxes, navigating his way down the lethal Dutch stairs into our parking garage. I offer to help him carry something, but he informs me that he is strong. He also informs me that he couldn't understand me when I trying to give him the address because his hearing is not so good. He's wearing typical Dutch brown pointy shoes, dress slacks and a copper colored blazer (as previously mentioned). Not what I would think someone who replaces locks would find comfortable for their line of work. He has to keep getting on his knees and then stand up to fiddle with the bullbar. He definitely has more strength and stamina than I'm sure I will ever have if I reach that age.

After several attempts with a battery-powered hammer drill like thingy, he is able to get the lock out. Alas... it is a half-cylinder and he only has a full cylinder with him. He needs to go find one and come back. I inform him that there is no rush and he can come back the next day or the next week. Apparently the next week was not good for him. We say our goodbyes. ("Dank je wel. Tot ziens!")

The next day I get a call from Joop, he has the lock and will be at the apartment in about 30 minutes. I'm not sure if it's my inability to pronounce Dutch properly or his poor hearing, but when I say "half elf?" to confirm when he would be there (this is Dutch for "half 11" which here means 10:30, NOT 11:30) he says "Yes, like I said, 30 minutes".

I hadn't gotten around to taking a shower yet (Don't judge! I do other stuff in the apartment in the a.m. before I take a shower), so I quickly take care of all that and go down to the lobby to wait for him. This time I'm able to see his car.. the CAR is copper colored. OH! Now I get it!! We go back down to the parking garage and he shows me the lock he found in some town I don't remember the name of. But he made it sound like he had to go far away. When I asked him how far away that town is he said "20 km". Um... k. To me, 12.5 miles isn't that great a distance. Any who...

This lock is FANCY! The keys are the kind that cannot be duplicated just anywhere, and there is a card that goes with the keys which must be presented to the locksmith in order to have a copy made. Alrighty then! He gets the lock mechanism into the hole only to discover he doesn't have the right sized screw. Sigh. I'm thinking he needs to leave and come back again, but Joop is resourceful! He takes an existing screw and cuts it down to size with a hacksaw. After a couple of cuts with the hacksaw... VOILA! The lock is in place and working as intended. He is proud of himself, as he should be.

Thank you, Joop, for your resourcefulness. We now have a fully functioning parking spot!!

Things in the NL that gross me out (1st edition)

Gross item #1:  For those that have been following my blog, you will undoubtedly know that the amount of dog crap (poep or schijt in Dutch) lying on the sidewalk annoys me greatly. I'm currently trying to come up with a t-shirt a la London's "Mind the Gap" t-shirt that says "Mind the Crap". The one thing that makes the dog poop situation just that much better is when it turns into a soggy pile during a rain storm or when someone has rolled their portable shopping cart through a pile and spread it down the sidewalk. YEAH!!! (Once I accidentally stepped in a pile while wearing my running shoes which have a really deep tread. BLEH!!!)

Portable shopping cart -- essential for doing grocery shopping without a car. I have 3!!

.

Gross item #2: A couple weeks ago hubs and I were walking back from the beach and there was a family walking in front of us. Mom wasn't wearing any shoes. I thought I was going to hurl the whole way home. Besides the abundance of dog crap all over the place, there are even more cigarette butts and broken glass. ACK!!?!!

Small victories

There are a few thins I've noticed about the Dutch since moving here. 2 of them are: 1) they walk REALLY quickly!; 2) colder weather doesn't seem to phase them

I thought I was a quick walker. I mean, I know I've slowed down with age, but I still thought I walked at a pretty good clip. That was until I moved here. I'm often being passed by someone while I'm walking down the street. I know Dutchies tend to be tall, but even the ones who don't look to be that much taller than I am are whizzing past me. A friend and I took a "free" tour of Den Hagg. (I say "free" because the tour guide told us as part of her introduction that there was an expectation of a tip once the tour was completed) I didn't think the tour guide was that much taller than I am. Sure, I was old enough to be her mother, but still... I walk every day. Any who... my friend and I were often at the back of the group as we walked through the city. Sigh. 

So... 1 small thing that makes me feel "good" is when *I* overtake someone while walking on the street. I don't care if they're 200 years old and using a cane... I have walked faster than a Dutchie!! WOO HOO!

During the colder months, I was often bundled up with a hat, and a scarf, and a warm coat... and still feeling chilled by the wind. (I purchased some AWESOME earmuffs while in Ireland last month because my inner ear will start to hurt from the wind, which there is no short supply of here in Scheveningen. They should help a lot come winter time.) I'd be walking along the beach seeing many people with no hats on acting like it was almost tropical!! Meanwhile I'm shivering, trying to pull my hat over my entire body.

Every so often, though, there will be times when I'm not dressed like a polar vortex is happening and I will see someone who is all bundled up. And I think to myself.. "YES! I'm not the coldest person out here!!!"

It's sad, I know, that these things make me feel better. But when you're the one who is standing out like a sore thumb much of the time, it's nice to be blending in on occasion.

Leapfrog on the tram

There is a game I often play when I'm riding the tram... leapfrog.
In most places the tram is running right beside the road where there are bicyclists, which we pass... until we get to the next tram stop.

At that point the fietser will keep zipping past the tram while we wait for passengers to unload and load. Then the tram starts up again, and sure enough we pass the fietser who just passed us!

I will continue this game for as long as I can.

What can I say... simple pleasures.

Apenheul (Ape Hill)

This past weekend hubs and I visited Apenheul in Apeldoorn. This is their website.

It's an interesting place that is only open during the warmer months and where 1 can view and walk among a variety of primates. There was little chance we'd actually be walking among the primates as there were many children at Apenheul and since the children were busy chasing the animals, none of the apes got particularly close to hubs or I. I actually felt sorry for the animals, and wished a couple times that they'd bite a child (not severely, of course) to teach them (their parents?) a lesson about following instructions.

It was definitely worth the 2+ hour travel time (remember, we don't have a vehicle and rely on public transportation for everything). And the weather was spectacular. No rain. Not too hot. We definitely lucked out with that.

Some ring-tailed lemurs watching a plane pass by overhead

They did have a few other animals in addition to primates. There was a rhea, a capybara (hubs was impressed with their size and thought they should've been used as the RUS's in "A Princess Bride"), and some Northern bald ibis which are apparently extremely endangered.

Northern Bald Ibis

There were signs in several places informing guests to not feed the primates, to not lure the primates and to not touch the primates. The signs also warned that the primates may bite. What did we witness within 2 minutes of entering the park? A woman luring a primate with some food so she could touch it. Sigh.

There were several parts of the park that were under construction: adding new exhibits or expanding existing ones. If we're still here next summer we may go again to see what's been added.

Strollers (Kinderwagens)

Strollers are a big deal here in NL. I am often in awe at the space-age looking strollers that I see being pushed around Den Haag. I guess it makes sense that strollers would be high tech given that the Dutch aren't afraid to go walking outdoors in any kind of weather, regardless of how old little Saskia or Willem might be.

The strollers seem to be some form of "transformer", starting off as a pram where the infant is lying down and evolving into something for an older baby. Often there is a sleeping bag-like cover that the child's legs are nestled into to protect them from the elements.

"Transformer" stroller

My favorite is the double-decker stroller where there is 1 pram on the top and another on the bottom. I've only seen a couple of these and I was in awe both times as their size.

"Double-decker" twin stroller

I've also noticed that, for some reason, the strollers usually have a V-shaped wheelbase, where the 2 back wheels are farther apart and there is either only 1 front wheel or 2 front wheels close to each other. I can only assume this provides for better maneuverability. Also, the seat that the child is in seems to sit higher than the ones I'm used to seeing back in the US.

V-Shaped wheelbase

No matter what the make or model, the strollers here are a far cry from the umbrella strollers I'm used to seeing. Then again, here in NL, when children are about that age the parents have already promoted them to a "balance bike" which I will discuss in a future post.

You can't get that here

There are a few things that just seem to be impossible to find here in NL. Some are just darned near impossible, and others are possible, at a high price. So, if you're going to be living in NL for an extended period of time and are extremely partial to these things, you'll need to bring them with you. I will discuss a few of them in this blog.

1) Top sheets for the bed. I have not found these ANYWHERE. I can find fitted sheets, pillow cases and duvet covers. That's it. Top sheets appear to not be a European thing, they simply use the duvet cover and wash that. Having done that a couple of times with the duvet cover in the guest bedroom, I CANNOT STAND trying to put that thing back onto the comforter. What a royal PITA! I'm sure there's some technique to doing this that I haven't mastered. Until that time, I'm glad I shipped our bed here along with it's bedding. Putting a freshly washed top sheet on the bed is extremely less time consuming.

2) Washcloths. They have things here for washing in the shower, they're just not the American version of a washcloth. These things are more like bathmitts. I cannot explain what my aversion is to these mitts, but I'm just not keen to use them. Fortunately, I shipped several washcloths here so I'm good until those become threadbare.

3) Any OTC med that contains amphetamines (e.g. cold/flu meds, sinus meds, etc). This one I found out the hard way. I had developed some sinus pain and was looking for something to alleviate it. I went to every CVS-like store I could find (Kruidvat, Etos) and I visited a couple apotheeks (actual pharmacies... pharmacists are only found in an apotheek). No such luck. I can't recall how I found out, but I learned that these things are only available via prescription. When Hubs and I went back to the US over the Christmas holidays I stocked up on cough/cold/sinus meds. My suitcase looked like Walgreens and vomited. Apparently the amount of OTC meds in my suitcase was of interest to US customs as they searched my suitcase on the way back to NL. Fortunately, everything was still in its original packaging, much of it not even opened. Dutchies seem to either be a heartier breed, or more into homeopathy. For sinus issues, use a saline nose spray. The saline spray is fine if it's something you do regularly and aren't in so much pain you want to drive an ice pick up your nose.

4) Stick deodorant. I have found roll-on and spray, but for whatever reason, the Dutch do not seem to be fans of stick deodorant.

5) Rubbing alcohol. Now, this one I don't have personal experience with but I did see a thread in an American expat group asking where to find isopropyl alcohol here in NL. This seemed to cause a rousing debate as to its availability. The upshot seemed to be that one could find it in the CVS-like stores, but it just wasn't the same as back in the US.

Don't use that, I might need it later!

I brought a few consumable things from the US that seem to be irreplaceable here in NL (see my other post You Cant Get That Here for other things that can't be found here in NL)*. For example: ZipLoc baggies, Reynold's Heavy Duty Aluminum Foil and Kleenex Tissues. Yes... I am partial to these brands. And it's not necessarily that these generic items cannot be found here in NL. It's more that what the NL use is not up to my standards.The foil doesn't seem as heavy duty, the tissues aren't as soft, and the baggies (at least the ones that I've found) are closed by either a twist tie or via a tab that is pulled across the top. These all work fine, it's just that, for me, it's like having to use regular grade gasoline when you've become accustomed to premium grade.

Since these things aren't readily available here, I have resorted to hoarding. They sit, rarely used, waiting for me to cave and make use of them. Much like when people keep a fine bottle of wine around for that 1 special occasion**.

The other night Hubs was kind enough to help make dinner. Now, before you feminazis get your panties in a knot over why shouldn't I EXPECT him to help make dinner, I'd like to remind you that I am NOT working. He is the sole provider so far and as such I am (exceedingly happy to be) responsible for cooking/cleaning/shopping. But, even if that weren't the case, having one's spouse/SO/mate/partner in crime/etc actually want to help with domestic duties should still be appreciated... but I'll leave that for a future post which will probably be titled "Where has all the empathy gone?"

But I digress... so, Hubs was kind enough to help make dinner. When he asked where the aluminum foil was I flipped. "DON'T USE IT!!! I'll just wash the cooking sheet." This, of course, aroused suspicion in him and I had to explain my desire to not use foil. In hindsight, I recognize just how silly that was. It's aluminum foil, not gold bullions set aside for our retirement. Hubs was considerate enough of my irrational fears that he only used as much foil as was absolutely necessary.


* If you go onto 1 of the "expats in NL" related FB groups you will quickly be told that whatever you are searching for can be found at Kelly's Expat. Kelly's is a store that specializes in British and American consumable items (sweets, medicines, baking goods, etc). The only problem is that you have to pay about 5x more at Kelly's than what you'd pay in the US. And since I'm more frugal than I am paranoid, I refuse to pay that much for these things.

** Except for the boxes of Kleenex tissues. Those we are using and as the number dwindles, I get more and more anxious about what will happen when they're all gone. The box of tissues Hubs bought prior to my arrival is NOT soft!! (I know... FWP)

Sidewalk Rage

Anyone who has ever been in the car with me while I'm driving or talking to me on the phone while I'm driving will confirm that I pay A LOT of attention to the road.

Hubs and I would frequently chat on the phone (hands-free of course!) while commuting to work. Here is what a typical conversation sounded like: (hubs) "Any thoughts on where you'd like to go for dinner?" (me) "I've had a hankering for get the fuck out of the way!" Poor guy.

I haven't driven much in the past 9 months, so road-rage isn't an issue for me any more. What I have noticed is that it's been replaced with "Sidewalk Rage". It's the same humanitarian desire to help the idiots around you properly use the surfaces upon which they (more importantly *I*) navigate. Since I'm walking, in public, where people can actually hear what I'm saying, the cussing stays in my head. But it's quite loud in my head and almost as frequent as when I was driving.

Just this morning I was walking down the sidewalk and a bicyclist was coming towards me, cuz, ya know... reasons. In my head I was calling her every name in the book, "politely" reminding her that it was a sidewalk and that there was, indeed, a dedicated bike lane just on the other side of the road. This was scattered with a few "fuck you"s, of course.

As mentioned in SEVERAL other blog posts, I am frequently avoiding dog shit, parked cars, scaffolding, parked bicycles/mopeds, moving bicycles/mopeds... WHILE REMAINING ON THE SIDEWALK! I don't want to stay cooped up inside the house, and I'm trying to get some exercise in and save money by walking instead of using public transportation. Also, until recently the weather hasn't been good enough for me to want to use my bike (rain and/or wind and/or cold).  I'm trying to do good here. Why can't people just let me use the sidewalk the way God intended? HUH!?!

Sidewalk rage... it's a thing 😈

Applying to be a patient (Dutch healthcare part 3)

(If you have not done so, please read my Dutch healthcare overview post first)

I've mentioned in a previous blog post about doctors refusing patients because of where the patient lived with respect to the doctor's office. Well... we have experienced it first hand.

Me... I'm planning on boarding the first plane back to the US if anything major happens to me. For whatever reason, I do not trust these doctors to actually take care of me in the manner to which I have become accustomed. Hubs, however, wants to find a huisarts (general practitioner, literally "house doctor"). So, he went to a doctor's office close to his work. Hubs works approximately 5km (3.1 miles) from out apartment, not some great distance away. And this doctor's office was close to the local hospital.

Hubs comes home from stopping by this doctor's office with an application form. And he said the receptionist told him he could "apply" as a patient but warned him that we live outside the "house visit" perimeter (I'm paraphrasing here). I was floored that doctors actually make housecalls here. I mean, how hard can it be to "prescribe" paracetamol over the phone? 😉

Now, hubs will defend the person with whom he spoke as not having a great grasp of English (WHAT?!?! Not everyone speaks fluent English here? That just can't be!!! < snark >) but it sounded like she had a good enough grasp, and he did come home with an application form. So, I'm thinking she was able to explain it pretty accurately.

Yes, it is true, in the US a doctor's office can reject a patient if  (among other reasons) the doctor's office is not accepting new patients, or is not in the patient's health insurance network. But I don't think I've ever heard of a doctor refusing to take on a new patient because of where the patient lived.

How I stand out as an American

Following upon my rant (read it here) about all these lists on the internet that talk about the many ways Americans stand out overseas (and they usually seem to be somewhat negative), I thought I'd create a list of my own.

1) If I had brought my dogs with me, I would not leave their shit on the sidewalk. I would dispose of it properly. Yesterday Hubs and I watched someone actually pick up their dog's crap... I about fainted.

2) When waiting to get on a train/tram/elevator, I back away from the door to allow the people getting off enough room to do so

3) When waiting to get on a train/tram/elevator/bus, I don't try to butt my way in front of others who have been waiting to board prior to my arrival. (I intentionally omitted bus from #2 because here in Den Haag riders can only board the bus at the front and riders can only exit the bus from the other doors). When we were coming back from Keukenhof last month we were the 3rd, 4th and 5th people to wait in line for the bus to arrive. Once the bus finally arrived, the people who had been standing behind us in line tried to worm around to my left and squeeze between me and the door. I wasn't having any of that... with my left hand I took a hold of the bar just inside the bus door, blocking any further advancement of the jerks behind us, and made sure hubs and my friend got on the bus before them.

4) I actually verify there are no bikes/mopeds/cars coming before I step out onto the street. Interestingly enough, drivers seem to get irritated if I wave for them to proceed while I'm standing beside the road. Hubs and I were walking yesterday, not even in a crosswalk but getting ready to cross the entrance to a parking garage. We waved the approaching car to proceed, but the driver refused. Whatever.

5) I DO NOT RIDE MY BIKE ON THE SIDEWALK!!! Just this past Saturday I almost got mowed over because I verified there were no bikes approaching in the bike lane (it was a situation where bike traffic is 1 way), crossed the bike lane and stepped in front of a bicycle riding on the sidewalk in the direction I hadn't looked, because the fietser was too freaking lazy to go on the other side of the street to ride in the bike lane going in the proper direction. And on Friday I was walking on the sidewalk facing down a fietser because she wanted to turn right, and even though the sidewalk was curbed to accommodate fietsers turning right, she didn't feel compelled to actually bike where she was supposed to, even though the bike lane was literally RIGHT BESIDE THE SIDEWALK!!! GRRR!!!

6) I don't push my shopping cart sideways down the grocery store aisles. Here in NL, the grocery carts (winkelwagens) have 4 wheel drive... each wheel on the cart can spin 360 degrees. On more than 1 occasion I've come across a fellow shopper who, for some reason I cannot fathom, thinks it is a wonderful idea to push their cart perpendicular to the aisle.

7) (Related to #6) If I see other people coming down the sidewalk or store aisle, I will make room for them, even if I'm walking with someone else. I swear the Dutch play a game called "How much sidewalk can I use?". I have seen groups of 4-5 people walking side-by-side on the sidewalk. And these aren't American sidewalks that are luxuriously wide... nope. There is barely room for these people to walk abreast. But, by God, they will do it and they're not interested in making room for people walking in the other direction. Similarly, I've seen groups of fietsers biking side-by-side where 1 is actually biking on the sidewalk to achieve this goal. Heaven forbid that person should have to bike behind the others (to be fair, these are usually school-aged children).

8) When I get on the bus/train/tram, I always get into the interior seat (if it is available) and place my bags on my lap, making sure the seat beside is available for other rides to use. (See this blog post)

9) I'm not openly belligerent to strangers if they don't acknowledge that I'm speaking to them. (See this blog post and this blog post)

10) I actually say "Yes, please" and "No, thank you". As I mentioned here all conversations are to be bookended with some form of salutation. You can be as rude as you want anywhere between the salutations, but if you don't bookend your conversations you are rude.

How to get someone to turn off their phone in a movie theater

Let me start this entry by stating that I was indeed in the wrong.

Yesterday, hubs and I went to see "Shazam" at Pathé Spuimarkt.

Pathé is the only non-Indie theater chain in Den Haag and there are 3 theaters. One is literally attached to the apartment building in which we live and is the theater we typically utilize, for obvious reasons. There are 2 more in the city center, 1 which I've been to a couple of times with a friend of mine... another American expat who has lived here for about 15 years and married a Dutchie. She's been a great source of Dutch info and a good friend, too.

Pathé does "50+" days where anyone 50 and over (Yikes! Did I just admit that I'm that old?!?!?!) can watch a matinee of a movie that was released 6+ months ago, and during intermission (yes, they have intermission) coffee and tea are served, along with "iets lekker", which translates to "something tasty" and, on the 2 occasions I've done this, involved a large KitKat. All of this for less than the usual price of admission. It's amazing how quickly old people (I'm not putting myself in that category yet!) can move when food is involved - lol.

The third theater neither hubs nor I had been to prior to yesterday but it was the only one not playing Shazam only after 7pm. From our time in that theater it seemed to be the busiest, loudest, and dirtiest of the 3. When hubs and I were there I noticed crushed chips at the top of every escalator. You might be wondering "just how many escalators does this theater have?". Since real estate is a premium here businesses build up, not out. The theater next to our apartment and the one we visited yesterday are each at least 4 stories high.

The night before we went there they had an incident where the police were called due to the suspicious activities of a few "youths". 

Police report of Pathé Spuimarkt Incident

So, yesterday, hubs and I are in the theater waiting for the movie to start. Prior to the previews airing a screen is shown (all in Dutch only) stating to not use one's mobile in the theater. This was shortly followed by a screen (again, all in Dutch only) about a rewards program the chain had that involved an app. I was interested in this program and immediately whipped out my phone. Yes, I had taken notice of the screen about not using my mobile, but I figured it was only the previews so it didn't really matter, and I had every intention of turning off my phone before the movie started (you know what they say about the road to hell and good intentions, right?). And in my head I kept hearing Greg Kinnear in "You've Got Mail".... "A HOTDOG is singing. You need quiet while a hotdog is singing?"

A couple minutes after I had started using my phone (still well before the movie actually started) I felt a swift kick to the back of my chair. The theater had stadium seating, so kicking the back of my chair meant kicking me in the shoulder. Thinking it was someone adjusting their sitting position I said "Ouch" and kept futzing with my phone. A few more kicks and I turned around to see what the hell was going on. Seems the "gentleman" behind me, and his lovely companion, wanted me to turn off my phone. I said "Sorry" and turned off my phone, but I was livid. (Note: after this incident, a couple came into the theater and sat in our row, and the guy briefly used his phone, too, but I didn't feel our row of seats being jostled with swift kicks)

As I said at the start of this post, I was in the wrong. A message had appeared stating to not use one's mobile and I was most definitely using my mobile. Nevertheless, is this the best way to handle the situation? Would it really have been so difficult to tap me on the shoulder and ask me to turn off my phone, instead of kicking me in the shoulder.... repeatedly?

Either way... well played. I have learned my lesson and will NOT be using my mobile in a movie theater ever again.

I was spoiled by London

A friend of mine from the US visited us for a couple weeks last month. The first week was spent seeing the tulips, and touring Amsterdam, Rotterdam and Delft using our apartment in Den Haag as base and the second week the 3 of us stayed at an AirBnb in London.

Although the flat averaged out to "so-so", there were some things about London that spoiled me and I'm still trying to get back into the Dutch groove. (Why "so-so"? The location was decent, very close to a tube stop, it had WiFi, a lovely terrace with table and chairs for dining al fresco, and it was an OK size. But my and hubs's bedroom was in the front of the flat and it sometimes sounded like there were no windows or that they were all open. It was a small street... was it really necessary to try to haul ass down it in their cars only to come to a stop 1/8 of a mile later? The neighbors above us seemed to enjoy doing laundry at 10pm which my friend could hear from her bedroom and which she said sounded like a helicopter taking off. The last couple of nights it was if a neighbor had just purchased a new entertainment system and was trying it out. We could hear what they were watching. The door to our en suite bathroom only shut if you pulled with all your might and VERY quickly as the door had swollen. Of course, when you did that the bedroom door popped open. The en suite bathroom was truly a "water closet", barely room to turn around if the door was closed, which it wasn't, cuz you couldn't. The sink was in this niche where normal people couldn't insert their shoulders without twisting their upper body - made brushing teeth interesting. And the water in the en suite bathroom was just warm enough to take a shower... although I noticed the pipe between the on/off control and the temperature control was very hot... so I'm not sure where the hot water was actually going)

But I digress... why was I spoiled????

1) English. It was EVERYWHERE! Most of the people spoke English first, not another language first and then repeating what they just said, with a 'tude, in English. I finally realized I didn't have to try and translate what they were saying - lol. And the signs were in English. I could read what was written without whipping out my phone and frantically typing into Google translate. It was a nice little vacation for my brain, ears and eyes.

2) CONDIMENTS! One thing that got my friend the most during her week here in NL was that many restaurants charge for condiments. She asked me a couple times why they did and the only answer I could provide was "cuz they can". I've looked it up on the internet and could not find a reason for why they charge. But... be warned. If you are addicted to ketchup and you want to visit NL, bring your own. Trying to get condiments in NL reminds me of a Jim Gaffigan joke: 'the guy handing them out always treats you like you're taking from his personal stash. "Looks like my kids aren't having ketchup tonight."' But in London... OMG! It was there! On the table! Waiting to be used!! As much as you wanted!! For ZILCH, NADA, €0, £0, $0... Gratis! FREE!  🎶"as free as the wind blows... as free as the grass grows..." 🎶 oops... sorry about that. Got a little carried away.

3) The sidewalks... they were actually being used as... SIDEWALKS! And ONLY sidewalks. I almost fainted. Sure, I was dodging people on the sidewalk, but they were SUPPOSED to be there. I didn't have to keep an eagle eye for dog poop. I wasn't stepping around parked bikes or mopeds or vehicles. I wasn't being run down by bicyclists. It was so weird! What a novel concept. The sidewalk is for pedestrians only. It's not an alternate commuting surface or parking area. It's for people... to walk! Why, just today I was facing down a deranged fietser on a narrow sidewalk because they didn't feel like biking on the road... where all the other fietsers were biking. Hubs made some comment about the bicyclists knowing where they should be biking in NL, to which I replied "Yes... any flat surface". And, it's true, they will literally bike anywhere as long as it's flat.

There was definitely a smaller number of bicyclists in London. Like.. I could almost count on 1 hand the number of bicyclists I saw in a given day. But 1 of our tour guides was quite proud of how many bicyclists there were. <snort>

4) OTC cold meds... Here in NL you cannot buy cold/flu/sinus meds over the counter like you can in the states. You can only get them via prescription (and that ain't gonna happen... paracetamol to the rescue!!!) Coming back to NL from the US after our Christmas holiday our suitcases looked like CVS vomited. But go to a drug store in London and... lo and behold... cough and cold medicine to be purchased without the consent of a physician. Good to know that I don't have to fly all the way to the US to get me some Dayquil.

So, thanks, London for teasing me with your more western ways....
 🎶 so close, so close and yet so faaaarr  🎶

Free Dutch lesson

As I may have mentioned in earlier posts, there is a small farmer's market every Thursday near our apartment. A stretch of street is blocked off from cars (*NOT* bicycles... *NEVER* bicycles - lol) and vendors set up their stands. There's a couple cheese stands, a few produce stands, a baked goods stand, the nut stand, a hard sausage stand (go ahead, laugh), a "snoep" stand (candy), and some other butcher stands.

I usually go to 4 stands: the butcher stand that sells eggs (eggs are NOT refrigerated here and are sold in either 6 or 10 count.. rarely 12), a cheese stand, the nut stand, and a produce stand. On occasion my sweet tooth kicks in and I'll visit either the baked goods stand (YUMMY muffins) or the snoep stand where you can get 4 Mars candy bars for €1!! (The European Mars bar is really a Milky Way)

European Mars Bar -- aka Milky Way

Today I was at 1 of the cheese stands trying to speak Dutch. I was doing ok, asking for what I wanted, making it clear up front that my Dutch is "niet zo goed". I did tell the vendor that I speak "een klein beetje Nederlands" but that I was trying to speak Dutch (all in Dutch... mind you). 

Side note: The Dutch seem to like to remind me that I speak "een klein beetje" Dutch ("just a little" or "an ounce" if you're talking about cooking). Not "een beetje" which is "a little" or "some". Nope... that doesn't accurately reflect just how ignorant I am of their language. And they usually chuckle when they say it. So, screw 'em... I've adopted the phrase myself. And then... POW... I understand or use a word they don't think I should be able to use and it surprises the crap out of 'em. lol

Any who... my interactions with the cheese vendor evolved into an impromptu Dutch lesson.  He'd say something in Dutch, I'd give my best impression of a deer in the headlights, and he'd repeat it back to me in English. "bijna"... "almost"

I was appreciative of his 1) not laughing at me and 2) wanting to actually help me learn. I also learned that there are some Dutchies who are willing to teach me their secret language!

Dank je wel, Meneer Kaashandelaar!!

She who will not be ignored...

Hubs and I went to Breda a few weekends ago for their "Hop On/Hop Off Beer and Food Truck Festival". Don't ask me why "Hop On/Hop Off" was included in the title because the entire event took place in an ice rink.

Inside the festival

It was a fun event, albeit a little pricey. You purchased tokens that looked like poker chips which were used to pay for the food and beer. There was no discount for bulk chip purchases. But, the beer and the food were good, and we weren't going to be driving so there wasn't that worry. We would've made it home with TWO tasting glasses, but, alas, I dropped one while waiting for the bus to take us back to the train station. (I may or may not have been a little tipsy at the time)

Words to live by!

None of the above is really relevant to this blog, other than to explain why we were in Breda.

There were several chickens and roosters roaming free in the park near the train station

Shuttle buses had been set up to take participants to/from the train station and the event. Hubs and I were standing on the bus platform at the train station waiting to board one of the shuttle buses when a woman walked up to hubs and said something to him in Dutch. I was completely oblivious to the fact that someone was attempting to talk to hubs. Now... it's not uncommon to have people come up and beg for money. It's not an every day occurrence, but it has happened a few times. With that thought in mind, and since he can't understand much Dutch, hubs ignored the woman.

Being ignored did NOT sit well with the woman AT ALL. She switched to English but spoke in such a tone as to imply "How dare you ignore me!". She wanted to know something about the buses, and 2 gentlemen standing behind us ended up answering her. Now, these 2 men appeared to speak Dutch so I'm not sure why they didn't answer her to begin with. Either way... don't ignore the Dutch cuz they are not afraid to bite your head off.

Proud to be an American.. dammit!

[warning... rant ahead]

A popular thing to do seems to be to beat up on Americans... even among Americans. This isn't a new thing. I've heard stories much of my life about how rude American tourists can be, how very few speak another language, and how very few own a passport.

(Not trying to brag, just trying to put some credibility behind my opinions...) Having visited several countries on 4 continents, "rude" is relative. We are part of our upbringing and culture. We get used to certain behaviors because they are acceptable within the culture we were raised. Therefore, what's "rude" to one group of peoples is NOT rude to another. Sure, Americans may come across as rude to the Japanese (just as a hypothetical), but the Japanese lack of personal space comes across as rude to Americans. So... KNOCK IT OFF ALREADY!!! It's these differences that make us diverse, right? We're supposed to be honoring/respecting/preserving our different cultures... right? What makes Americans different shouldn't be viewed as bad, cuz it's not. I've seen some pretty rude British tourists in my travels, and there are things the Dutch do that I consider rude (their "directness" being top of the list). But neither of these people would consider what they're doing as rude... it's part of their culture... to them it's acceptable behavior.

As for the other 2 comments about Americans, all I can say is... "DUH!" The United States and its territories cover a sizable portion of the Northern Hemisphere. I can travel from Alaska, to Hawaii, to Maine, to Puerto Rico, to Guam... and never need a passport. I can experience different "cultures" (just look at LA vs Topeka 😉) ,  and different ecological regions ("The United States may be the most ecologically diverse country in the world, home to 21 of 28 globally defined ecoregions."  Quoted from here).

And although Europe may have a higher population than the US, the US is larger geographically. It can take quite a while to visit all 50 states. And only 1 language is needed to visit all these places. Of course Europeans learn multiple languages... you cross a border and more than likely you'll end up somewhere where the native language is not your own. Hubs and I can travel no more than 3 hours by train in any direction (except NW, cuz then we'll end up in the North Sea) and be somewhere where they don't speak Dutch. Since I've moved to NL I've been to countries that speak French, Spanish, Portuguese, and Arabic and have flown shorter flights than it takes to go from Washington DC to LA. Plus there are many English speaking countries on the planet as well. Heck, you could visit at least 2 other continents and not have to learn another language.

On top of the above complaints there always seems to be a new list on the internet of the ways Americans stand out when traveling to other countries. Again, all I can say is.... "DUH!". Every culture stands out when it travels abroad in some way or another.  (You ever been around a group of Dutchies either just heading out or just coming back from holiday? Plug your ears cuz they can be quite loud and hyper-verbal) And that standing out should be ok. We don't want everyone to be the same, do we? I mean, there's this huge push for diversity everywhere. Well, outside the US Americans are in the diverse group. These differences exist within the US itself. New Yorkers are considered rude (and even that slur is focused on NYC, not the state). Mainards can't give directions ("Yeh kant get thah from heeya"). Californians are a bunch of stoner surfers. Oregonians are tree huggers. Texans love guns.

So... lets stop proposing these differences as "bad" (Just recently someone posted yet another list in an American expat group where the poster asked "how many are you guilty of?" Why "guilty"?Why the negativity?) and embrace them as being no more than "different"

[end rant]

A predominantly cashless society

Most every merchant here accepts debit cards as payment. To pay by debit card is to "pinnen" (note: very few grocery stores in NL accept credit cards, which can be a real issue if you're a tourist). The 2 signs below are common sights in The Netherlands.

Loosely translates to "We accept debit cards"

Loosely translates to "only debit cards accepted here"

Pinnen Ja Graag is often seen at farmer's markets where the vendors have this device that is also used by restaurants. It is portable and allows the customer to either hold their debit card up to the machine or insert the card into the machine and enter the PIN for completion of the transaction,similar to the one shown below.

portable debit card reader

Hier Alleen Pinnen is usually seen in brick and mortar stores like grocery stores.

(It just dawned on me as I am writing this that you NEVER see a "Cash Only" sign)

The upshot of all this is that merchants very rarely seem to have actual cash in the store. This is good as it keeps everyone safe... there's nothing to steal, right? However, there is a downside to this. It's almost impossible to get change. I have heard cashiers ask on more than 1 occasion if the customer had a smaller bill. When I've seen this it's usually because the customer has a €20 or €50 and they're buying a small amount of stuff. 

I experienced this the other day and it surprised me. I was at Zeeman's (think "Dollar Tree", but more along the lines of cheap clothing and cleaning products, and most things cost more than €1) purchasing €0.50 worth of dishwashing detergent and all I had were €10's and €20's. I really wanted to break one of the bills because I had forgotten to keep a €1 coin and €0.50 coin with me as I suggest here. I was really looking forward to this opportunity to at least get a €0.50 coin. HOWEVER... when I handed the cashier my €10 she asked me if I had anything smaller. (On a side note, she said it in Dutch and I COMPLETELY understood what she said!!! WOO HOO!!) My response was "Pinnen?" and I heard the tone in response as "Of course you can use a debit card, moron!"

So... heed my advice from my earlier post and hold onto those €0.50 and €1 coins at all costs... you may never see one again!

It's different and yet the same

One thing about living here is that many of the plants here (and wildlife) are the same as what we experienced in Northern Virginia. Forsythia, rhododendron, hydrangea... they all exist here just as they did back home.

Granted, I could've stayed within the US and seen vastly different flora and fauna, but it's still a little disheartening that I moved almost 4 thousand miles away and end up seeing the same things.

You CAN sit here, but I can ignore you...

As I mentioned in this post, it's not uncommon for passengers on trains and trams to place themselves and their possessions in such a way that makes it impossible to sit in the seat beside them. All the trams have 2 seats on at least 1 side of the aisle and all the trains have 2 seats on each side of the aisle. But, when you walk onto 1 of these modes of transportation don't be surprised if you see either someone sitting on the outside seat, or sitting on the inside seat with their bags taking up the outside seat.

Heck, hubs and I even saw 1 guy take up FOUR seats on the train over the weekend. There are spots on the train where 1 row of seats is turned backwards such that it faces the other 2 seats and there's a little table attached to the wall. A nice way for 3 or 4 people to ride together and be able to talk. Well... this guy was sitting in 1 of those 4, on the outside seat and had his stuff sitting on the other outside seat. How nice.

Any who... hubs and I were on the tram earlier that same day and we sat behind a woman who was sitting in the outside seat. A few stops later 2 women with a boy get on. The women were speaking Spanish to each other, and 1 seemed to indicate to the other to ask the woman in front of us if she could sit in the inside seat. The woman who was already seated allowed the new passenger to sit on the inside seat, and then promptly turned sideways such that her feet were in the aisle and her back was to the woman who just sat down. A stop or 2 after that another woman gets on with a dog. The woman sitting sideways made quite a show of petting and talking to the dog. So... she could be nice to dogs, but not to people. I was laughing. Finally, the woman sitting sideways gets up so the dog woman could take her spot, and then sideways woman goes up to the front of the tram to talk to the driver (BTW - there is a sign explicitly stating that talking to the driver is not permitted during the ride)

I keep trying to find a benign reason for the woman's behavior, but I'm having a hard time coming up with one.